Dog

A lingering fearfulness of mine was confirmed in conclusion night: My domestic dog mightiness live slightly retarded.

I’ve wondered well-nigh her tidings always since I adopted her in addition to later discovered that she was unable to figure out how stairs worked.

I blamed her ineptitude on the fact that she’d spent most of her life confined to a small-scale kennel because her previous owners couldn’t command her. I figured that mayhap she only hadn’t been exposed to stairs yet. Accepting the noble responsibleness of educating this poor, underprivileged creature, I spent hours tenderly guiding her upwards in addition to downwardly the staircase – placing biscuits on each footstep to lure her in addition to celebrating whatever sign of progress. When she yet couldn’t successfully navigate the stairs at the terminate of her inaugural off calendar week alongside me, I blamed it on her extreme lack of motor control. This domestic dog is uncoordinated inward a means that would propose her canine lineage is tainted alongside traces of a species alongside a dissimilar position out of legs – similar mayhap a starfish or some variety of primitive snake.

The adjacent clue came when I started trying to develop her. I am no stranger to grooming dogs – much of my childhood was spent working alongside diverse canines because I lacked the social skills to interact successfully alongside people. With therefore many years of experience behind me, I was certainly that grooming this novel domestic dog would live a real unproblematic task.

I was wrong. Not entirely is grooming my domestic dog outlandishly difficult, it is also heartbreaking. She wants therefore badly to delight me. Every fiber of her beingness quivers alongside the wish to hit a proficient job.

 

She tries really hard.
But when turning her head at an extreme angle fails to produce a life-altering epiphany, she normally only short-circuits in addition to rolls on her back.
Over the past times 2 months, she’s made some progress, but it’s been painfully dull in addition to is easily forgotten. Still, I was living nether the supposition that mayhap my domestic dog only had a hidden capacity for tidings – that all I had to hit was function hard plenty in addition to mayhap she’d wake upwards ane twenty-four hr menses in addition to live smart in addition to capable similar a normal dog. Until in conclusion night.
Last nighttime I was sitting on my couch mindlessly surfing the mesh when I looked upwards in addition to noticed my domestic dog licking the floor. Just licking in addition to licking. At inaugural off I though mayhap I’d spilled something there, but her licking did non seem to live localized to ane spot. Rather, she was walking or therefore the room licking seemingly at random. She lay downwardly on her side in addition to kept licking out of the side of her oral cavity patch staring conduct at me.
At that 2d I realized that I needed to know for certainly whether my domestic dog was retarded or not.
I Googled “how to say if your domestic dog is retarded” in addition to after a fight of research, I institute a domestic dog IQ exam that looked fairly legitimate. It involved testing your dog’s powerfulness to solve a few real basic problems, similar figuring out how to exit from underneath a blanket.
I gathered the necessary supplies in addition to began testing.
The inaugural off exam asked me to telephone telephone my domestic dog using a multifariousness of words that were non her cite to guess whether she could say the difference. I called out “refrigerator!” in addition to was pleased to encounter that my domestic dog did non respond. She also failed to response to “movie,” “dishwasher” in addition to “banana.” I was get-go to experience very proud of her. Then came the crucial step: I called her name. Nothing. I called it a few to a greater extent than times to live sure. Still nothing.
The words hung like a neon sign broadcasting my dog’s failure. “It’s okay,” I thought. “She’ll hit ameliorate on the adjacent one.”
In the 2d test, I had to position a blanket over my domestic dog in addition to fourth dimension her to encounter how long it took her to instruct out. I threw the blanket over her in addition to started my stopwatch. She made some cursory attempts at freeing herself, but every bit the seconds ticked by, it became clear that she was non going to pass.
Still, I gave her the hit goodness of the incertitude in addition to assumed that she only enjoyed beingness nether at that topographic point in addition to could exit if she wanted to. I added an extra dyad points to her agree for faith’s sake.
After flagrantly failing 3 to a greater extent than tests, it came downwardly to the in conclusion trial. If she could grade 5 out of 5 possible points on this department of the test, she could bump herself out of the bottom category into “below average.”
First, I had to brand her sit, which was a exam inward in addition to of itself. Then I was supposed to exhibit her a biscuit, allow her sniff it, in addition to therefore – after making certainly she was watching – house the biscuit on the Earth in addition to position a plastic loving cup over it. If she knocked over the loving cup to instruct the biscuit inside a certainly amount of time, she’d exceed the test.
I position the biscuit nether the loving cup in addition to started the timer.
My domestic dog ran over to the loving cup in addition to sniffed it. She walked or therefore it ane time in addition to and therefore looked upwards at me similar I was some variety of wizard. I pointed to the cup. I knew it was cheating, but I wanted to aid my domestic dog exceed her test.
She didn’t understand, but she knew she was supposed to hit something, therefore she only started frantically doing things because mayhap – only mayhap – ane of those things would live the correct matter in addition to the magical sorcerer loving cup would allow her know where the process went.
After 5 minutes of watching my domestic dog aimlessly tear or therefore the house, I finally accepted that she was non going to exceed whatever purpose of the exam in addition to yes, she was most probable mentally challenged. But damn it, I was non going to allow my poor, retarded domestic dog experience similar she failed.